Take smaller steps

Being fearless and taking a leap of faith is something we all have had to do or will have to do at one point in our lives. Yet sometimes we must take smaller steps. This too will bring us towards our goals and help us succeed. Sometimes we have to dissect the big steps in to a few smaller ones just to be able to cope and see what's along the road ahead.

Replace negative thoughts - Love yourself!

Replace negativity with something positive and of use to you...smile, laugh, dream, live and free yourself! 

Sometimes we may find that when we do not live in the present we forget to do what is best for us. For me, this can be forgetting to banish a negative, low level thought with a more positive one. It can feel tremendously difficult to not allow our mind to give these negative perceptions strength or control. Because once we do they not only effect our own inner peace but also of those around us. 

An example of my own peace of mind

When this happens to me (because it sure does) I regain control of who I am and do what I love to do best which is light up my candles and incense, put on soft calming music, turn off the lights and sit. Yes just sit! I can sit there for a long time and allow the thoughts to disappear. Yoga has the same effect helping me to focus on my breathing releasing tension not only in my mind but also through my entire body. Both enable me to regain my sense of self and place in the world. It reminds me of who it is that I am.

I know I am not merely of this body because I feel a connection to something bigger than the ideas in my head, the emotions I feel and the planet I live on. It is this connection that can surprisingly bring me back to reality. The reality that I am and we all are here in the now, living and experiencing, dreaming and visualising, creating and modifying. 

Love yourself!

There is so much of ourselves that we do not see at any given time. We ignore our own beauty and compare ourselves or get preoccupied with those around us. There are many times where we do not show love or time to the one person who will make a difference in our lives...ourselves! Learn to like YOU, learn to love YOU...because I tell you something you do already know but forget...there is no one else like YOU. You are you and you are great! Like and love yourself enough so that you can make your life fantastic, awesome and fulfilling!

Wait I hear those little thoughts in your head..."but I don't feel great", "but...but I am not as qualified"...hmmm is that the line you feed yourself with? Well you may want to change it because really you are what you say you are.

Start accepting who you are, I mean every part of you, flaws and all! Once you accept the you in all it's different forms you can begin to like and love the unique and wonderful person that you are. Before you stick another negative thought in your way...think about what this thought is really about? are you simply telling yourself how you don't want to be? If so why don't you do something about it?

Take control

Take control of your thoughts and replace them with that image, thought, memory, action or sound that gives you peace, makes you smile, leads you to the person you want to be and which enables you to start loving yourself. 

Stop wasting your time with unproductive thinking. Take a different approach and change those bad habits that do not serve your life purpose. 

Think love, be love and live the life you love!

Actively listening

When you begin to listen you realise what you have been ignoring. Words others say sometimes move through you and have no meaning. Listen so that you understand the message. Listen and be present. When we do this we will understand each other better, respect our differences and behave in the one way that will bring positive change, with love.

Self - esteem

“Self-belief is feeling good enough. It's the feeling that you can handle what life throws at you. It's a healthy appreciation of your talents, characteristics and abilities”

Fiona Harrold, Indestructible Self - Belief 

7 simple steps to getting it and keeping it!

What I have been making myself aware of lately is....we are conditioned by our past experiences! The reality is once we understand this and know how it affects us we will then be able to make changes to the image we have of ourselves. This will no doubt bring positive changes to our life. Our self - esteem will increase once we grasp who it is we are but most importantly who it is we want to be. 

It is paramount to understand how you see yourself. It not only enables you to feel good about the wonderfully unique person that you are but it will bring new changes in to your life that will surprise you. Because I know you will discover and radiate a new found fearlessness!

Understanding who you are is not an easy task. Needless to say, our journey is never ending and has its ups and downs. This is normal of course and simply the joy of our human experience. In our lives we have times where we can feel great, happy, confident, intelligent, beautiful, sexy and smart. However there can be a flip side to this. Yes! Ugly, silly, jealous, frumpy, skinny, fat, filled with anxiety and misery. Here are some questions to ask when you begin to label yourself in a negative way.

Do these words serve a good purpose in my life?

Do these labels make me feel better about myself?

Do I want to accept these words in to my life knowing the negative effect they have on me?

If the answer to these questions is NO then ask yourself: Do I want to do something about the way I see myself? If you do then you have taken the first step in acknowledging your current state of mind. You may not imagine it right now and you may feel it's a bit of a joke but that too is the impact and consequence of using these negative labels on yourself. Remember we can actually convince ourselves of our lack of self-worth. Surely this actually makes us quite powerful!

Now it is all well and good to read about this and find ourselves nodding in agreement but take no step in moving forward and making a difference in our life. So what will you do? Sounds simple doesn't it. Of course no one wants to feel negativity running through their entire being yet so much can happen in someone’s life that sometimes it is quite hard to see a way out. So it may well be hard to make these changes but why should you do this alone when you can ask for help. Remember there is always a way.

Here's something simple to try out to give you a positive start!

1. Contemplate

Think about who you are. Write down what your achievements are and all the positive things about yourself. If you find this hard, ask a good friend to tell you what they think. You will be pleasantly surprised. I'll give you one that I know already is a positive aspect of you and I haven't even met you!...You are a conscious being who cares about their life.

2. Change your thoughts

Listen to what you say to yourself. Catch yourself out when you put yourself down. If you mutter to yourself "I'm not that smart" then think about changing this to something more positive like "I'm a smart person who can make smart decisions."

3. Change your actions

If you are now telling yourself "I'm a smart person who can make smart decisions" then act this way!! Maybe you are the sort of person who always says "yes" to others as you live in fear of what would happen if you said "no". Break habits that you don't want to have and that does not serve your life purpose. Only you know what they are and only you can change them.

A thought from me: stop thinking everyone else is better than you. You would be surprised to know that even the most confident, outgoing and successful person has the same fears as you. We all have suffered from lack of self-esteem at one point in our lives or throughout it. That doesn't mean that is how your life should be. You can change it! I have seen it happen so look ahead and believe in the power of change.

Life is wonderful only if you believe it is...go live it with your head held high, strength within and with an open heart and mind.

Live in the now

The best moments for me is when I am in the Now. When I can sit, talk, be silent or contemplate and appreciate my surroundings with myself or with others. It is when the past is not holding on to me, when the future is not my focus but the present moment is simply there and it fills me up with love. This is how I will know I succeeded when I can make these moments occur more frequently.

My thought for today: Be aware of the unnecessary chatter going on in your mind or a feeling of "something" you are meant to do. For instance, like the expectation you place on yourself to be liked all the time thinking you must make sure you do this, that or the other. Or when you want to be a "success" at work and try too hard. When these pressures are at the forefront of your mind there is no way of knowing if you are fully present. Life will simply pass us by. By being present you get to experience life and be in control of it.

A reminder by Eckhart Tolle:

“The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive. To put it more accurately, it is not so much that you use your mind wrongly – you usually don't use it at all. It uses you.”

The Power of Now

It's okay to take a break and take in the simple pleasures in life that make you smile, fill you up with joy and that take your breath away. So if you haven't done it already free yourself from the state you are constantly in, the one you rely on and step outside your own comfort zone to do, feel or be something different.

An insight into what we can do for our children...

This is an eye opener and a great read for parents, teachers and anyone interested in understanding the effects our society has on our children. 

Parenting and educating children are one of the most important yet difficult jobs to do. Before we can do either we must first understand how our children think, why they behave in a certain way and what is the most effective way of educating and helping them to become happy and responsible members of society. This book which is based on extensive research reminds us to do this not only with authority but with much warmth, love and care.